Something that lingers

I can feel it, it's something that's inside me.. wanting to break out of the rut, to say the things I wanna say to the people I love, do something for them. To create something, that's from my soul to yours. To find some relevance of independence, know who I am, who I am to my parents, and to my friends, and to God. You can never stop learning sometimes. I'm still learning. I guess I've wandered away somewhat, just because perhaps I was so jaded, talking and walking in circles. It's not that I didn't know what I could do, it's always the obvious choice, but there's something about me and rebellion. And there's something about me. Not following the things that are best for me, and then mucking around after that.

I guess in some sense, I wanna see this life take shape, but it's in His time and not mine. Yeah, there's impatience, there's a loss, and there's a relief all at once, and I want to feel it.

But yeah, there is a calm today, with most things. I've said all I can, and could, written as much as I wanted, give it what I could give. 'tis day we'll take note of what lingers in the heart, and lay it out in the sun.